Sunday, March 6, 2011

Might as well dream a little. Right?

For my future, I have a man picked out. I have some specific guidelines for traits of the next man I let into my life. Or should I say the FIRST man, because clearly the last wasn't an actual man, but a boy. Moving on. I thought I would share who my dream man is. I have created a list and in reality, the next person will NEED to meet most items on my checklist. I compromised before and never again will I compromise. I want what I want and if I don't find it, then I'm better off being alone. Some of this is all fun and games, so humor me a bit. I'm indulging in a fantasy for just one moment.

My LIST (in no particular order):
1. Passionate about Jesus in every way. Desires to be a Godly man and has hopes of being a Godly husband and father.
2. Pursues me, willingness to do a little chasing in order to "claim" me.
3. Passionate about life and everything that life entails-family (each other), friends, goals, career, interests, health, etc.
4. Supportive of my passions and even share most of the same passions.
5. Spontaneous and romantic. I want to be wooed, romanced, surprised. I want to see that an effort is made behind plans that are made.
6. Desires a large, loving family.
7. Takes responsibility with decision making, but values and holds my opinions in regard too.
8. Loves to dance and sing out of fun and goofiness even if it's just because it makes me happy.
9. A dreamer, but grounded in what is real.
10. Loves a variety of foods, willing to try anything, will eat for the experience.
11. Drinks coffee-yes this is important.
12. Being open with what is in his heart. Communication is key but more than that, I just want a companion that can talk with me, listen AND talk, be open and honest. Wears his heart on his sleeve similar to the way I do. I know that guys are different in that way, but I just don't want a brick wall for a companion. That trait clearly didn't work out for me.
13. Active and healthy. Someone that will go running with me, play tennis with me, go hiking with me. Desires to find active things to enjoy throughout the year.
14. Adores me for all I am. Believes that I deserve to be loved, honored, desired, and cherished. Not only believes it, but feels it and shows it.
15. Loves me through my love language.
16. Is taller than me. Not going to budge on this. Is that bad?
17. Chemistry with me. So connected to me that everything just fits like a puzzle piece. Each piece is different, unique both in quality and shape but when put together they create more of the whole picture and they interlock perfectly.
18. Adored by others, great social skills, has friends and wants to include me in those friendships to make them our friends and wants to be friends with my friends and most importantly that his friends like me and my friends like him.
19. Genuine through and through
20. Good family. I want to get along with his family and be treated like family without having to owe anyone anything. I just want relationships to be authentic. I also want him to connect authentically to my family too. To desire a relationship between families.
21. So handsome. It's very important to me that I'm physically attracted to this man. I want to swoon when I'm in his line of sight. Just being honest, I know it's cheesy.
22. Will read with me, will learn with me, will strengthen our relationship with me, pray with me, attend counseling and seminars to learn and grow. To understand that there is always room for growth and accept that ALL relationships take nurturing and not always can be done without the help, support, and accountability of others.
23. Which leads me to having an accountability couple.
24. Enjoys typical guy things. Sports for example at least a healthy dose of sports and not a couch potato sports spectator.
25. Sense of humor, a bit of wit and charm, but knows when and how to be serious and authentic too.

I think that about covers all I desire in a man. Knowing me, you should know what kind of man as far as looks go that I would be attracted to and in character too. But, in case it's a little unclear even after my 25 item list here are pictures to show you. Things you should know are that I'm not living in a fantasy. This is about having fun and dreaming a little. My list is mostly real, unrealistic or not it's what I want and that the following is about the characters, not the actors that play them.

Mr. Darcy, for his honor, tradition, noble character, and sincerity of words.

William Schuester (teacher from Glee) for his charm, wit, love for singing and dancing, pursuit of the woman he loves, passion for teaching, and his looks, specifically how he looks in a vest and hat.

You had to know this one was coming. Edward Cullen for his everlasting love and loyalty, for his strength, his passion, his openness and honesty, his desire to protect the one he loves, his gentleness and caution, his desire to protect his virtue and the virtue of who he loves, and his traditional values. The list could really go on and on with this one. But, I will stop here.

To sum it up for all 3 of my characters in addition to the traits they all have that I desire in a man, there is definitely some swooning involved with each of them.

Don't worry people, I don't spend too much of my day fantasizing about a new relationship. I have set my standards so high that I'm sure it's a bit far out that I even find someone who meets my standards. It might not even be God's will for me to meet someone else as much as I want to. I have to have peace with that and I know that I would rather be on my own then settle and make the compromises I once made before. Never again will I compromise who I am, settle for less than my best, be with someone who doesn't love every ounce of who I am even if that means being alone. I can dream though, and dreaming is what gives me hope.


Mary Ruth said...

Oh, Mr. Darcy - he could follow me around saying things like "I love you, most ardently" all the live long day! :)

Whitney said...

And when you meet this man, he will be all of the things you never knew you needed as well, and open your eyes to even more of yourself.

Because you are a new version of yourself, you will attract new people into your life. I know you will find each other!